As I stand in line I can't help but think of those kids. So many thoughts ran through my mind. One of them being that I was secretly hoping that someone would call in a bomb threat just so my flight would get delayed. Another one is something one of the kids asked. Someone said "Kuya Kevin how come you are not crying." I never answered them for whatever reason but that question kept playing on in my mind. I'm next to put my bags on the conveyor to get scanned when something tells me that I just can't leave.... not yet.I grab my bags and start walking back to the entrance through the crowd of people. I look around for everyone when I catch Thes out of the corner of my eye. She sees me and runs up asking me what happened. I didn't say anything but I grabbed her and gave her a hug. After a few seconds I said to her "thank you, thank you, thank you." The hug gets tighter and she says that all the kids are further down the terminal crying. I speed walk to find them. When I finally see them I run up to the first person I see. I hug them tighter than I've hugged anyone and I say "just because i'm not crying doesn't mean i'm not sad. I love you so very much." I did that about 15 times to each of the youth.
It's really time for me to go.... Actually it was time for me to go 15 minutes ago. As I walk away for the final time I say out loud to them. "thank you.... from the bottom of my heart thank you. You guys are my heart. I love you." That was the hardest thing by far that I have done in my life. I grab my bags and once again line up to check in. At this point I'm an emotional wreck but still I kept my composure and shed no substance you humans call tears.Finally I board the plane and take my seat. Before the kids left they gave me a whole bunch of letters that they wrote and I thought since I was just sitting there that it would be a good idea to read them.... BIG MISTAKE!!
As I read each one it gets harder and harder to fight those things you call tears. I say to myself there is only one more and I can do this.... I can fight it. I pick up the last one and its from Chelly. On the front it says " To my daddy"
Needless to say that the barriers in my eyes that once held back the tears finally gave in. Tears started pouring down my face and as hard as I could try they just wouldn't stop. There was a lady sitting next to me on the plane and she asked me if I was okay. In the maniliest voice I could make I told her that I'd be alright.
It wasn't until the day that I left the Philippines that I realized how much my life had changed. To think that this all started with a conversation at Tim Hortons with my friend Jon.... Blessed.
You might be wondering why someone would call me daddy.... I'll explain everything on the next blog
